Find a Quote of Ambrose Bierce

-Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

-Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

-Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.

-Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

-Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.

-Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.

-Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.

-History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.

-Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.

-Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.

-Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

-Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.

-Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

-Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.

-Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.

-Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.

-Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

-Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

-Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.

-Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.

-The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.